Life Abroad, Demystified

Do we do ourselves a disservice by sticking with groups that look like us when studying abroad? Or are we better of integrating with the culture of the country we’re studying or living in? And to what extent do you integrate without losing your identity?

One of the many great people I follow on Twitter brought an important topic to my attention, which centered around the issue of Emirati students failing to make the most of their experiences while studying abroad. I drew on my own experience as I took part in the discussion that ensued. The discussion centered around the issue of students refusing to integrate into the social fabric of their host countries. The tweep, who started the discussion, bemoaned the failure of some of these students to acquire a good command of the language of the host country despite living there for years.

I personally believe that many Emirati (and by extension Khaleeji) students fail to make the most of their time abroad due to how we were brought up; we tend to stick to people of our kind and hang out with them most of the time. While this is very common among different expatriate communities worldwide, I for one believe in adopting a moderate approach to life in general. Although I’m willing to concede that sticking to people of your own kind softens the blow of leaving your home country, it does students a disservice as far as self-development goes, especially if students end up shying away from integrating into the societies of their host countries.

When I left the country as an impressionable 18-year-old boy, I was, to some extent, unaware of what existed beyond our borders in terms of belief systems and ideologies. As a result of being told by my fundamentalist Islamic studies teachers that the whole world is onto us, I came to adopt a siege mentality that was resistant to change. I couldn’t fathom the idea that the world didn’t really revolve around us.

But after I realized that not everyone is out there to get us, I began to educate myself about Western history and philosophy. This experience had demystified the distorted views I had about these countries and people and made me realize that the West had at some point dealt with the same problems we are now dealing with. For example, I came to understand a great deal about the West when I read about the Thirty Years’ War, a bloody war that was fought in Europe between 1618 and 1648. This war had its roots in the sectarian conflict between Catholics and Protestants amid the fragmentation of the Holy Roman Empire and resulted in the loss of eight million lives.

Learning about the conflict had done a great deal to help me to make sense of Western society. They too were victims of sectarian hatred and intolerance. They’re human, just like us. This has taught me not to treat the West as a monolithic anti-Muslim bloc, which is a view shared by many people I came in contact with during my time abroad. The nuanced image I developed about the West was further refined by my conversations with my classmates and university lecturers. I honestly feel as though this experience has made me a better, more tolerant person overall.

Life is what you make of it. I hope those who get the rare opportunity to venture beyond our borders can learn to make the most of their experiences. We do not need to do away with our individual and collective identities but rather, we need to be more aware and educated about the societies and the communities that we choose to be a part of.