Filling the Social Gap in Home Quarantine

What creative ways could we cherish our relationships while we remain physically distant beyond typical uses of social media?

In some Arabic dialects, when a person wants to express missing you, they may say: mukanek khalee (“your place is empty”). In Farsi, one would instead say: delam barat tang shode (“my heart is tight for you”). I’ve been experiencing these sentiments more so than ever as we respond to the pandemic through quarantining and physical distancing. While I am grateful for technology offering us a way to stay connected, I am finding its potential for a deeper connection—for a more profound way to honor a person’s place and hold them tightly in our hearts—to be overlooked.

Social media is designed towards immediacy, which does not encourage critical thought or mindful ways of relating. The cluttered nature of social media is especially heightened with the boundaries between work, school, and our homes becoming less clear with quarantining.

So how can we use social media to connect more meaningfully while also acknowledging our limits? Here are some ideas to contemplate:

• Create gaps, even for a minute, in between time spent behind the screen. These gaps can be used to recharge away from the screen so that you will be better able to engage more meaningfully with others. In these breaks, you could incorporate gentle stretches, a brief meditation, deep breaths, relaxing with tea, or looking outside at something far away to rest your eyes. Set an alarm or have a household member hold you accountable.
• Reflect on the relationships you cherish most. You may document these reflections in a letter, a video, a voice-note, a song, a poem, or artwork that you can send to the person. Examples of questions that can assist you in this reflection are:
  1. In what ways has this relationship influenced the values you hold, the skills you have, your interests, your goals, the beliefs that keep you going, or how you see yourself?
  2. What do you most value about this person?
  3. What is one memory you cherish with this person?
• Set personal and professional development goals with an “accountability buddy.” If no one in your immediate circle is interested, Meetup has made their events virtual in response to the pandemic, and you could meet others who share your interests. You may also search for Facebook and LinkedIn groups that fit your interests. Set days to check in with each other’s progress towards your goals and plan around potential barriers. Do self-care activities virtually together like exercising or meditating via video call apps. Virtually create art together using prompts from Daftar Asfar’s Ranger’s Edition (Instagram: @daftarasfar). Celebrate successes and reflect together on what helped make them possible so you can learn how to maintain them in the future.

While these ideas are not exhaustive, I hope they can give you a starting point to consider more creative ways of staying in touch with others while physically distancing.