Gardening is one activity where we can witness the full life cycle and learn to have a different relationship with uncertainty, loss, and the sense of meaninglessness.
Iraqi artist, Sadik Kwaish Alfraji, illustrates existentialist philosophy in how he depicts physical and spiritual displacement. Silhouettes of people feature prominently in his art, bent in uncomfortable positions, aimlessly walking in blank space, or falling into unknown dangers. When I started gardening on my balcony in December 2019, I noticed how scattering black basil seeds into the blank black soil paralleled the ways those silhouettes were randomly flung around. Noticing this parallel imagery during COVID19, when I would hear news of deaths and illnesses in my immediate circle more than in any other time, had me reflect on gardening as a hands-on way of approaching the meaning of life.
Alfraji’s artwork suggests that we are purposelessly thrown alone into life and the suffering it contains. Mainstream ideas about “purpose” are biased by an individualist and linear view of life in which we alone are architects of “purpose” as we walk a straight line with a beginning, middle, and end. This view naturally lends itself to the question, “what’s next after the end? What’s the point of reaching this end?” It has us view ourselves and other living beings as tools—objects for a particular end “purpose” before being disposed of.
Gardening confirms the bitter truth that we are flung here without having a choice as to whether we will be born, what circumstances we will experience, and the fact we will all die. But gardening shows that life exists in cycles, not in lines, and that nothing can exist in isolation from relationships. A seed cannot sprout without giving to the world and receiving from it.
The seed is not simply thrown as a flat empty silhouette, but it arrives at the world with the DNA passed down from its ancestors. This DNA cannot unfold without soil, sun, air, and water. The plant relies on other living beings such as microorganisms and the CO2 breathed out by humans and animals, and in return, we rely on plants as sources of nourishment. The death of the plant feeds the microorganisms, which then feed other plants, and the cycle goes on. Without reciprocal relationships, we humans cannot exist, let alone have a sense of “self” or create meaning in life.
Our relationship with our caregivers and siblings is the first relationship we have in our life. How our first relationships treat us can impact our relationship with ourselves and other people in the future. Our households, schools, and workplaces are part of a larger society with their own ideas of how we are supposed to relate to one another. As we grow up, we encounter new relationships that have the potential to either confirm or reassess how we see and treat ourselves and others. Our past and present relationships and society can impact our self-worth, and what role we believe we can play in the communities we are a part of, impacting how we make meaning of our lives. While we may learn to reassess what aspects of our experiences and society to uphold versus set aside, we cannot fully escape their subconscious influences.
Since body language trumps verbal communication between humans, we don’t even need to “speak” to have our mere presence influence one another. Have you ever experienced feeling so moved by sharing silent moments with someone you love? Has anyone ever told you how they feel in your presence, even if you are not speaking or saying anything profound?
Part of living a meaningful life involves asking ourselves: “what kind of ancestor do I want to be?” This opens up room for a sense of continuity after we die.
Gardening shows us that we cannot see ourselves in isolation of past and present or in isolation of relationships. It also shows us that we shouldn’t underestimate the power of simply “being.” All things in nature play a role in the ecosystem even when they are not actively doing so. You are worthy not because you are trying to “achieve” an end “purpose.” You are simply worthy of “being.” Being is not possible without relationships. Meaningful relationships provide a cyclical view of “purpose” that is larger than ourselves.
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